Piece of a dream...

i am watching a video about a band named " ---", one of the guys reaches out and squooshes anothers face as he says the band's name, he has red curly hair and a beard... they've just had a new album come out...they are a Scottish rock band, one female & three males...the music sounds really good!

(eclogue)

the morning mist lies heavy
on the fields in
the lowlands

there is a chuck jones cartoon playing across the sky
sam & ralph clock in
and it begins

Word of the Day

eclogue
Meaning: a poem in which shepherds converse

Thank you, Merriam Webster, for this entry. But, seriously? What a niche genre!!! Would any one care to submit a poem in this style?

(untitled)

longing for the sound
whip-poor-will on the back stoop
singing summer nights

rain like drums

i am terrified
i am scared
i am not centered
time is roaring past me
i need to stop
and see
i need to feel
i need to be

unease

I am not centered.
I am scared.

5:00 a.m.

clear mind of chatter
focus on lilting bird song
early spring morning

dream segment...

i am hanging out with a Gypsy performance troupe which has come to the area...one of the men and i fall in love with each other...it is sweet and dark and intense...as the days go by, he is talking about some of the trials of his life, as he speaks, the pain is visible on his face, even to the point of physical change, as if the pain causes a rash which is an indicator of the severity of experience...another time he says that soon one of must go or one of us must stay to which i reply, "oh yes"...another time i am looking deeply into his face, clear now of the pain...as the troupe is packing, getting ready to depart, it seems that i have decided to go with them, he throws a beautiful brown dress (which is folded) at me,but i note a frown in his eyes and don't know why, then one of the troupe members, a female, naked, with long curly red hair dances up to him and they do a tease routine together...i notice that he looks at me sidelong and i realize that he is testing me, that he must gage my reaction to this routine...after all, they are a performance troupe, and do this stuff every town they visit...i look on thinking all this, and trying to figure out how i feel about it, i give a smirking laugh then.....

the alarm wakes me up and i don't know how i decided to react...

midnight

i reach deep into my innermost being and
bring out a ball of pain which i
hold in my hand, saying "this is that which is holding me back from life"
you reach out, and lifting the orb from my palm
say "i will take this from you and
destroy the anguish"

dream segment

i find a broken skateboard (which is Melian's i think) and instead of throwing it away, i inspect it closely, then begin skating on it...i coast around the patio, cruising over to say "hi" to someone who lives there (is it my house???) then i coast over past Melian to show her...

Russian dream...

i am walking around a department/clothing store in Russia...as i pass through the Men's Department, i notice that there are a lot of very cute young men looking through the shirts...they all have hipster haircuts...some of them are wearing headbands, some sunglasses...most all of them are wearing and/or looking at open plaid oxford shirts...i think of how i need to tell Melian about this amazing array of cute Russian guys, so i call her on my cell phone...

EARTH HOUR 2009

Candles and woodstove fire. Talk about movies we've seen recently, and Roman history. Laugh a lot. Play with and love up Rhiannon. Melian plays "Animal Crossing" on the DS. The cats lounge about and come over for head rubs. Joonie attacks my hair, and purrs. (March 28th, 8:30 p.m. - 9:30 p.m.)

slice of dreaming...

i come back home from work and there is a lot going on at the house where i live...lots of people...preparations being made for some sort of event...joey is there helping with the music...i am trying to remember a certain song, and am having no luck, so i grab a laptop that no one is using and try to search it out...the laptop grows increasingly difficult to use; the buttons grow smaller and the search capabilities more and more esoteric...

3/16/2009...moon in Sagittarius...

apply myself in detail to those things that matter to me
pay attention to
those things that i love
settle into
what brings me peace of mind and contentment

of late
my attention diffused and wandering
in depression/it
has given me a sense of time flying away
a feeling of fatality and pointlessness
of self

dream segment...

i am on my lunch break from work, and i am in a grocery store buying something to eat...i look across to one of the other registers, and there is Tracey (Ray's ex- wife) buying some stuff also...i have not seen her in a long while, so i try to get her attention, finally somebody else gets her to look over at me, and we walk over and talk...soon we are taking our lunch together, then drinking a few beers...we never go back to work, we walk and talk, then drive to my house...i apologize for the mess, i tell her that i have not vacuumed in a week...we hang out some more, i worry about not having returned to work, she doesn't seem to care...she used to work at the place where i do now, she calls a guy who works there on her cellphone and tells him that i have gotten drunk...that kind of makes me angry, i have had only 2 beers, i am not drunk! so we sit on the couch/bed talking more, i say we should go get some more beer...she stands up and stretches and says that she needs to leave...this also angers me, as i have not gone back to work mostly at her suggestion, and now she is leaving? what am i to do? i have been upset the entire time by the nagging fact that i do not know the phone number to my place of work, so i could not call them and tell them of my plight, and Tracey was no help with that at all...

amalgam of workplaces dream...

i am at work...i am doing something around the back of the store, which is like Crown Books, but i am also working with groceries...i move to the front of the store and notice some customers who look like they need some help...i assist them in making their ice cream selection (oh no! Coldstone Creamery!), actually it is sorbet that i am going to pack for them and they will pick it up on their return...they are quite happy as they leave the store...then i begin putting the sorbet blend together for them, but the flavors keep changing, and the containers keep morphing, so it is rather difficult...the flavor containers are on shelves on the wall, the wall that was the fiction paperback wall at Crown...

dreaming of breakfast...

i ask Melian what she wants for breakfast, and she tells me, "Pancakes. Today and forever."

I am in the kitchen doing dishes when i remember this dream piece. The memory is so strong that i am not at all sure whether it was a dream or not. So when i am doing my shopping after work, i make sure to buy some all-natural pancake mix just in case!!

dream segment...

my partner (male) and i are going to start a resturant, we have bought a fabulous space in which to do this...it's an old farm-type building, just beautiful...as we are making plans for opening, we are garnering the assistance of a friend (female) of ours in the food preparation...next thing i know, she is bringing dishes in and setting up...it all starts to take off without me, i don't know what to do! i am getting frustrated and worried and confused as each moment brings something else along that has been done without any input from me! we're open, we have customers, we have all sorts of new employees: waitstaff, chefs/cooks, etc. i am walking around trying to get a grip on this, it's crazy...i go to clean tables, put out clean silverware...i find a lot of dirty untensils and ask someone if we have a place for washing the silverware! i find a tray of soapy water for the purpose of soaking the dirty untensils so i drop them in...then i try to get clean stuff out on the tables, put it's all so unorganized that it makes the task very difficult...we even have plastic forks & all to keep up with...i wonder if i will be able to get it all under control...

Beer & a Book

"Hazed & Infused" is a dry-hopped ale from Boulder Beer Company in Colorado. Tasty, with a really good aftertaste. Part of their 'Looking Glass' beer series. I've been on a real hop adventure recently, and this one fits right in quite well. Unfiltered also, yeah!

'Secrets: A Memoir of Vietnam and the Pentagon Papers' by Daniel Ellsberg is truly riveting due to the in-depth detail of his research, clearances, education and emotional perspectives on the Vietnam war situation. I am learning ever more about this historical period during which I grew up. Recommended quite highly. Visit Ellsberg's website here...

@ the 9:30 Club, April 7, 2009...

Oh, yes, yes, yes! I hope to go to this show. I am a big fan of Digable Planets.